If Your Looking For Me, I'll Be In The Closet!

- Elda-Rosa Coulthrust, MA, LCMHC, LCAS, CCS

A quest for autonomy...

Every now and then, I share my private thoughts. I recall as a child, carving out a secret hiding spot in the lower corner of my bedroom closet. I remember the token treasures that I would stash in my secret place - a tattered shoebox with gum, a few coins, comic books, a Michael Jackson - Off The Wall button, etc...

The feeling of comfort that would surround me when I would crawl into this tiny safe pocket, slide the tall wooden door closed and click on my dimly lit Fisher Price flashlight - it was quiet, it was cluttered and I just knew that if I made it inside without a witness - no one would find me. It was safe.

Fast forward to "now", as adult, there is some degree of allure in "hiding". In fact, the interest in hidden doors, secret compartments and clandestine passageways has been around since ancient times. A moment to escape the seemingly constant intrusions can be vastly enticing.

So, why do we hide?

The reasoning for elective hiding would not be that far removed from that of a curious child. We seek control over our environment. Putting ourselves in a place in which we aren’t subject to distractions, or the supervision and monitoring of those people or things around us -

As the immensity of the world can seem overwhelming, by "hiding away" it appears to me that this action can temporarily reduce the size of the world, when it all gets to be too much and - without doubt - it is a quest for autonomy.

The next time you're feeling like you need a "time-in" try to identify a low traffic, quiet place where you can dedicate some time for yourself - to reflect, read, write, regroup, meditate or just sit in peace.

So, if you're looking for me, I might just be in the closet!

- Elda-Rosa